TANGENT SUNSET

COMMON CREEPS by Alex Cosper

What did you think of Bush's news conference on energy, Iraq and social security? (4/28/05)

respondent quote
GW BULLSH: I think he made it clear that we're making progress with Iraq. In order to defeat the terrorists, we have to spread democracy and freedom. It's not easy to go from a tyranny to a democracy, even though it sure seems easier to do it the other way around.
UNKNOWN SKEPTIC: It was another classic whitewash brainwash speech. I started counting how many times he said "we're making progress" and it got to be so many times that I lost count. I think it was his last hurrah speech before he takes a severe nosedive in the polls and his so-called mandate/legacy is exposed as pure fluff. The latest polls show him in the low forties. I think after this speech we'll see him dip into the thirties, possibly twenties.
BROKER BOB: I'm really amazed by his plan for social security. It's the best plan I've ever heard. Keep it flexible. Let people choose between stocks and bonds. Well, that seals it. I think he just lit the spark that will reverse the declining markets on Monday. Also look for Bush's poll numbers to go up - dramatically - next week.
SKULL MADISON: Now that particular speech...let me tell you something about great speeches, because I've heard 'em all going back to George Washington. Usually politicians have one good speech in their entire career. With Bush, it's like a great speech every time. He's right, you know, to encourage oil producing nations to put more crude oil on the market. And if they don't, let's see who's the quickest at a pre-emptive strike.
COLLEGE STUDENT: Bush not only has the weakest speech writer who makes up bogus statistics and tries to make everything sound simple and vague, he's brainwashed himself into thinking he's succeeding even with the stench of neo-con exposure in recent weeks. I've heard Mark Maron and Mark Riley talk about it on Air America. Bush is convincing to the weak-minded - who want to be told what to think, but for those of us good at seeing through staged political word-juggling freak shows, that press conference was still the same old song and dance.
OLD MAN WICKER: Well, I was relieved when he said that everyone born before 1950 would be entitled to all their social security benefits. I hope that still pertains to people born before 1850.
GOOFBALL GREG: He stayed on topic by saying we gotta keep taxes low, but he started to lose me when he made some wack comment about working with the Democrats. That's like saying "oh I'm open-minded, I consider all ideas, even from proven losers." I just wish Bush, who trounced whoever the Democrats ran in the last election, would just get back to trying to make it a one-party system.
JENNIFER: I kinda get the feeling that maybe he's been listening to Air America. I can't believe he actually started talking about how people should conserve energy and then later he talked about how the great thing about America is you can have any faith you choose. He also said he wanted to listen to ideas from Democrats. Either he's gone liberal - but by the liberal definition, not the conservative definition - or maybe he made some deal to get Democrats to back off Tom DeLay.











© 2005 by Alex Cosper. All Rights Reserved.